


It's Rough

by sappiestlady



Category: WTFock | Skam (Belgium)
Genre: Boyfriends, Cuddling & Snuggling, Hurt/Comfort, M/M, Panic Attacks
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-06-18
Updated: 2020-06-18
Packaged: 2021-03-04 07:21:53
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,918
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/24789949
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/sappiestlady/pseuds/sappiestlady
Summary: Robbe wasn't in school, and Jens is worried, which makes Sander worried. Sander grows more concerned when Robbe calls him, sounding sad.
Relationships: Sander Driesen/Robbe IJzermans
Comments: 4
Kudos: 170





	It's Rough

**Author's Note:**

> So like it's not great. It's not. 
> 
> Oh BTW Robbe's mom lives with him

When Sander got a text from Jens, he half expected it to be asking whether or not his mother had restocked the liquor cabinet. 

From jens:  
have you seen robbe lately

Sander’s brow furrowed. 

To jens:  
i saw him yesterday for lunch why

From jens:  
he wasnt in school today 

To jens:   
did you hear from him?

From jens:  
no 

To jens:  
i’ll let you know if i hear from him

Sander felt a pit in his stomach. This wasn’t like Robbe. Even if he was sick, he would let Jens know that he wasn’t going to school. To just disappear wasn’t like Robbe, especially now since he was living with his mother again.

At the realization, he sucked in a breath. 

Was everything okay with his mother?

Almost as if on cue, Sander’s phone rang. Sander saw Robbe’s face flash on the screen and he answered it immediately, biting his lip.

“Hey, love.” Sander said.

“Hi, Sander.” Robbe’s voice came through the phone.

“How are you?” Sander said. 

“I’m okay.” Robbe said. He had hesitated, his voice catching a bit.

They just breathed for a moment, and Sander wasn’t sure exactly what to do. Robbe wasn’t one to share what was going on in his head. Sander had just found out about his suicide attempt and they were coming up on their six month anniversary.

“Can you spend the night?” Robbe asked.

“Absolutely.” Sander said. 

“Okay.” Robbe whispered.

Something was definitely wrong.

“I’ll be there soon. I can make us croques.” Sander said, already standing and packing a backpack. 

“Okay.” Robbe said. 

“I love you.” Sander said.

“I love you.” Robbe said.

Sander’s parents were visiting his younger sister at her boarding school, so he didn’t need to tell anybody about where he was going. He pulled on his Doc Martens and sprinted out the door, feeling himself become anxious as he strode toward Robbe and his mom’s house. 

He turned onto Robbe’s street and shot a text to Jens.

To jens:  
hanging with him soon ill lyk everything

Robbe had moved in with his mother into their old apartment. This was a few streets away from Sander’s house, about a twenty minute walk. 

He made it in ten.

He strode up the door, nodding to the doorman that thought he was dating the girl next door to Robbe. Sander walked up the few flights of stairs to Robbe’s apartment. He stopped in front of the door, knocking on it lightly.

“Robbe?” He said. He glanced at his phone.

From jens:  
ok thank you

He pocketed his phone, not bothering to answer. After a silent moment, he tried the door handle. The door opened silently with a soft push, and he stepped inside. He unlaced his shoes, pulling them off and dropping his bag to the side of the door. 

“Robbe?” He called out quietly. He walked through the apartment, quickly realizing he didn’t hear any noises. He padded up to Robbe’s room, noticing the door ajar. He poked his head around the corner and looked in.

He felt his heart stop.

Robbe was sitting on the edge of the bed, facing the door. He had tears pouring down his face, his body shaking with silent sobs. He was wringing his hands in front of him, his knobby knuckles shifting over each other. His eyes were open wide and his face was red and he was biting his lip. 

The look on his face was what made Sander hesitate. Robbe’s face was scrunched into a face of pain. His eyes were staring off into space and they were puffy and red and lost. 

“Oh, Robbe…” Sander said, pushing the door open. 

Robbe’s head jerked to him and as he saw Sander, and he clenched his eyes shut. As Sander took steps forwards, he realized that Robbe’s sobs were just soft, hitching breaths. He kneeled in front of him, his hands shaking next to Robbe’s.

Robbe always knew what to do, what to say. So what the fuck was Sander supposed to do when Robbe was like this. When Sander was like this, Robbe could fix anything. But Sander always fucked up, always broke everything.

“Sander…” Robbe said softly, his voice breaking.

Sander put his hands up to Robbe’s face, gathering his pained expression in his calloused hands. Robbe continued to dissolve in front of him, hanging his head. Sander’s hands traveled to the back of Robbe’s head, threading his fingers through the hair there.

“You’re okay. It’s okay.” Sander said. 

Robbe kept wringing his hands, his body shuddering with hitches of his breath. Sander ducked his head to get a look at Robbe. Robbe’s face was still twisted in an expression of pain, making Sander even more concerned.

“Are you hurt?” Sander asked, leaning back to look him up and down. 

When Robbe shook his head, Sander felt his stomach drop to the floor. Sander could clean wounds and patch up cuts, but he wasn’t sure what to do now. Robbe’s face contorted even further and he let out slightly louder, more heaving sobs. 

“Come.” Sander said, putting a hand on the back of Robbe’s neck and looping an arm around his waist. Sander sat next to Robbe on the bed, pulling him in for a hug. 

Robbe didn’t reciprocate right away, he just clutched the front of Sander’s jacket. Robbe planted his forehead onto Sander’s shoulder, letting out another breathy sob. 

“You’re okay.” Sander said. 

Robbe shifted his hands to wrap them around Sander, pulling him into a hug. Sander rubbed the back of Robbe’s head and kissed the side of Robbe’s head. 

A few moments passed where Sander took all of his self control to not baby Robbe. He wanted to ask him if he was hungry, needed a shower, a massage, anything. But Robbe was still crying, his body shaking still. Robbe took about twenty more minutes to calm down, finally lifting his head and sighing. 

“I’m sorry.” Robbe said softly.

“No, no, no, Robbe, it’s okay.” Sander said. Robbe nodded, pursing his lips. 

“Alright.” Robbe said. Sander rubbed Robbe’s cheeks with his thumbs, smiling gently.

“Do you need anything?” Sander asked. Tears sprung to Robbe’s eyes anew.

“Please stay with me.” Robbe said. 

Sander nodded immediately, shrugging off his jacket, throwing it on the floor. He crawled under the comforter with Robbe, pulling him closer. Robbe tucked himself under Sander's head, resting his hands on Sander’s shoulders. 

They laid in silence for a few moments, their breathing synching up. Sander felt Robbe’s heart rate slowing down. Sander rubbed Robbe’s back, the fabric of his tshirt moving with it. Sander pressed a kiss to Robbe’s forehead, smiling against it when Robbe pressed closer to him. 

“You’re okay.” Sander said, pressing another kiss to Robbe’s forehead.

“I am.” Robbe said. 

“Where’s your mom?” Sander hesitated before asking. 

Robbe froze before he began crying anew, shoving his face into Sander’s chest and squeezing Sander’s shoulders. Sander shushed him gently, instantly regretting what he asked. Robbe sounded so heartbroken it physically pained Sander, making him feel sick. 

“I’m sorry, I shouldn’t have---” Sander said. 

“She’s back in the institute for the time being. She tried to hurt herself.” Robbe said.

“Oh, baby, I’m so---” 

“She can’t do it. She can’t stay out. I can’t live with her.” Robbe said, his voice shaking.

“You’re okay.” Sander said.

“I couldn’t take care of her. I couldn’t keep her safe.” Robbe said. 

“Hey, hey, hey, it’s not your fault.” Sander said.

“Yes it is! How am I supposed to help her when I can’t---” Robbe sat up, planting his hands on Sander’s chest. Robbe was straddling Sander, his knees on either side of Sander’s hips. 

“Listen, Robbe, you’re going to work yourself up.” Sander said gently.

“It doesn’t matter, I can’t even keep her safe in our own home.” Robbe said. He was sobbing again, his shoulders heaving.

Sander kept shushing him, reaching up to cup Robbe’s cheeks. Robbe’s arms were shaking, the pressure on Sander’s chest making it hard to breathe. Robbe’s sobs were still silent and it made Sander so, so sad. 

“I love you. You’re okay.” Sander said softly, sitting up and pulling Robbe into a hug. 

Robbe hugged him with fervor, arms squeezing Sander’s torso. Sander kept calmly rubbing Robbe’s back, whispering calming words. Robbe had his face buried into Sander’s neck, his shoulders shuddering. Robbe kept grabbing at Sander’s shoulders, fingers trying to find a holding.

“Breathe with me, please, baby.” Sander said. 

“I can’t.” Robbe said. Sander eased Robbe’s face out from his shoulder and pressed their foreheads together.

“Yes you can, just breathe with me.” Sander said. 

Robbe squeezed his eyes shut and let out a choked sob. He was beginning to hyperventilate and shake even more. Sander kept shushing him gently, rubbing hands up and down his back. Robbe’s hands were scrabbling at Sander’s back, his hands shaking. 

“Ride it out, baby.” Sander said. 

Robbe was gasping, his forehead pressing against Sander’s. Robbe kept calming down, his breathing slowing, but every time he got close to being completely calm, his breaths would stutter and he would moan and launch into a panic again. 

Robbe kept sucking in breaths, his body shaking. Sander could feel Robbe slowly calming down, his breathing getting better and better. He sighed and fell into Sander’s arms after a while, his breath shaky.

“I’m sorry.” Robbe said after a few more minutes. 

“You’re perfect, it’s okay, believe me.” Sander said. Robbe’s face loosened at that, his face beginning to calm.

“I’m sorry.” Robbe said, leaning back. 

“You don’t have to be, I promise.” Sander said. Robbe nodded silently, biting his lip. Sander pressed a kiss to Robbe’s cheek, squeezing him again. 

“I love you too.” Robbe said softly after a few moments of silence. 

“We can work on things tomorrow. Now, you need to sleep.” Sander said.

“Okay.” Robbe said. 

“Are you hungry at all?” Sander asked.

Robbe shook his head. 

“Do you want to change? Get ready for bed?” Sander asked. 

Robbe nodded, sitting up a bit. He got to his feet and moved to his bureau, opening his drawers and rifling through clothes. Sander reached over to his phone, typing out a message to Jens. As Sander typed out a message, he tried to ignore the way Robbe’s breath hitched every now and then. 

To jens:  
he’s rough

From jens:  
wdym he’s rough

To jens:  
something happened with his mom

From jens:  
keep him safe

To jens:  
i will. i promise.

From jens:  
i trust you

From jens:  
i dont want to overwhelm him

From jens:  
i may come by later pls update me

To jens:  
absolutely

From jens:  
goodnight

To jens:  
goodnight

Sander put his phone down just in time to catch the clothes Robbe threw to him. He stood and changed his shirt and pants, back to Robbe so as to not give him any ideas or wrong perspectives. 

“Are you ready?” Sander asked. 

“I’m tired if that’s what you’re asking.” Robbe said. 

“Let’s go to bed.” Sander said. 

Sander turned and was startled, Robbe was right behind him. Sander gathered him into his arms, pulling him into a hug. Robbe dissolved into his arms, going limp and pressing his nose into Sander’s collarbone. 

Sander maneuvered them so they were lying on the bed. Robbe was lying on top of Sander, their legs intertwined. Sander pulled Robbe in close, sighing. 

“I love you.” Sander said into Robbe’s hair.

“I love you too.” Robbe said.


End file.
